Damon the Babysitter
by Dbz VD rox
Summary: AU: After leaving for a party, Damon is left alone with his brother's and wife's daughter. How with the vampire cope with babysitting? R&R!
1. Chapter 1

Hi, this is my first VD story. I love VD and Damon so much and this idea came to mind. I hope you all enjoy and feedback is greatly appreciated!!

Chapter 1

Elena finshed off the last button on her dress and looked in the mirror. Not too bad. She thought as she analyzed herself. Her hair was pinned up in a bun and her necklace that contained the vervain was wrapped around her neck like always. Her glowing white dress dazzled and light danced in the tiny jewels that were embedded in the center.

Giving herself a nod of approval, she turned around to find Stefan standing there, unmoving. He was always mesmerized by her beauty, and tonight was no different. She looked absolutely stunning. Like a white angel who had fallen from heaven, a perfect being. Her milky dress ran down her body and covered every inch of it in pure white. Elena walked closer to him, her high heels making noise every time they clicked against the ground. She flashed him a smile and took his hand in hers. "Ready to go?"

Stefan nodded. They were heading to their favorite resturant in town and then were going out for some dancing. "Do you have a babysitter for Miranda?" Elana asked. Miranda was their daughter. They had her a few months ago. Stefan and Elena loved her. She was a planned baby, and of course prior to her being born she was an instant daddy's girl. Stefan would do anything for her. She had him bound to her every will and was permantently wrapped around her finger.

Stefan sighed. "I just tried another babysitter and she said that she can't do it."

Elena groaned. "Then what are we supposed to do??"

"I'll watch her."

Stefan and Elena both turned their heads to the sound of Damon's voice. "You'll do what?" asked Elena in shock.

"I'll watch the the little tyke for you. You two go have a good time." He ended with a smirk and a wink.

"I'm not letting you watch my daughter." Stefan said in a protective voice.

"Aw C'mon, she'll be fine! I haven't tried to eat her yet so what's the big deal?"

Elena looked at Damon weary for a moment before turning back to Stefan. "We have no one else to watch her, Stefan. And besides, I think this will be a good bonding experience for them."

Stefan sighed as he looked into Elena's pleading eyes. He couldn't say no to her when she looked at him like that. "Alright, fine. He can watch her. But the second I feel that something isn't right, we are coming back. No queations asked."

Elena nodded. "Deal."

"Now if you two lovebirds are finished, you have a reservation to go too." Damon said as he waited by the door.

Elena nodded as she started for the door. "You know my number if anything comes up."

Damon sighed as he nodded. "Yes yes, now go have fun and leave the kid to me. We'll be fine."

Stefan reluctantly walked towards the door but not before turning to Damon, smirking. "Actually, I kinda like the idea of you babysitting Miranda. Now you get to go through the hell that I went through when I first started taking care of her. Have fun!" The door slammed quickly shut behind Damon, leaving him to pounder what his brother just said. "Go through the hell that he went through." snickered Damon to himself. "She'll probably sleep until they get back."

As if on cue, a baby's wailing could be heard from upstairs.

So, how do you like it so far? Please review! I'll hav the next chap up as soon as I can!!


	2. Chapter 2

Damon inwardly groaned as he trudged up the stairs to the baby's room, flinging the door open and appearing in front of the cradle using his vampire speed. "Here we go." he said as he picked up Miranda out of her cot and held her close to his body, hoping she would calm down. She didn't.

Damon sighed. "Guess I have to do this the easy way." he held the small child's face close to his, and just as he was about to compell her, she project vomited all over his face.

Damon just stood there while warm, half-digested milk ran down his shirt and leather jacket, all the way to his black boots and then hit the wooden floor. He slowly counted to ten before looking back at the infant to see that she was calm. "Well, atleast you stopped screaming." He quickly set Miranda back down in her bed just as his cell phone started to ring. "What?" he sneered into the receiver.

"How's my girl doing?"

Damon growled at the sound of his annoying brother's voice. "She's doing just fine right after she puked all over me!"

Stefan's roaring laughter only made Damon madder. "What the hell is so funny?"

"What happened to all your confidence? I thought taking care of a child was going to be easy for a strong vampire like yourself."

"Screw you Stefan." Damon hit the "end" button before stuffing his phone back into his half white pants.

Just as he was walking out of the nursery, a foul smell attacked the sensitive vampire's nose and nearly caused him to gag. "Wh-what is that smell??" he slowly turned back towards Miranda, and it only took him a few minutes to figure out why it smelt so bad. "Oh god no! I have to do that?!" He slowly walked back to the crib and glared at the small child. "Come here you little stinker." he picked up the smelly baby and held her at arms length as he walked towards the changing table. He laid her down and slowly undressed her, the putrid smell getting stronger every second. "I'm going to kill Stefan when he gets back." He removed the diaper to reveal the cause of the smell. "SWEET MOTHER OF GOD!" Damon leaped back from the table when his hand over his nose and mouth, obviously trying to keep his lunch down. Miranda giggled and kicked her legs, happy that the dirty contraption was off of her. Damon held his breath and walked back to table. The annoying ringing of his cell phone stopped him in front of the table. Quickly pressing it to his ear, Dsmon hissed angrily into the phone, "WHAT??!"

Stefan's laughter was like nails being hammered into the back of Damon's head. "Glad you're having fun with Miranda. By the way, baby wipes are in the top right cabinet." the buzzing of a fly taunted Damon; he jerked the phone from his ear but the fly echoed continuously.

Damon blocked out the noise and focused only on the child needing to be cleaned. Still holding his breath, he threw the dirty diaper in the bin and grabbed a new one. Getting a wet wipe, he proceeded to clean Miranda as she squirmed and wiggled around, causing Damon much trouble. "Argh, stay still will ya?" using his other hand, Damon held the little body in place as he cleaned her. Just as he was finishing up, Damon felt something warm and squishy in his hand. Looking down, he came face to face with a fresh, brown ball of poop in his hand. "Ewww..." cried Damon as he ran to the bathroom to dispose of the toxic waste.

A few minutes and a still unclean baby later, Damon emerged with a now clean hand and quickly put a clean diaper on the squealing baby. "Your Daddy is gonna have hell to pay when he gets back." Damon said as he set Miranda back into her bed and covered her up with the blankets. A small smile crossed his face as he watched the sleeping baby. She's actually kinda cute, when she's asleep that is. Damon thought to himself as closed the door behind him and anxiously awaited Stefan and Elena's return.

Hope you enjoyed this chap! I will be updating with more so stay turned. In the next chap, Damon attempts to feed little Miranda. Should be interesting! Lol Please review:)


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Damon sat on the couch, drinking his last glass of Coke. "Stefan is gonna pay up big time." He set his glass on the table just as the phone rang. "Probably Stefan asking about that brat." Damon grabbed the phone and put it to his ear. "What?" he growled.

"Damon, this is Elena. We're gonna be out a little later then planned so could you give Miranda a bath and feed her please?"

Damon felt his willpower crumbling as his eyes glowed red and veins sprouted on his face. Long fangs began to grow and he growled animal-like into the phone. "There's no way in hell-." He was then interrupted by a baby crying. He soon regained control of himself and sighed. "Fine I'll do it." In a flash, he was, yet again, infront of the baby. He stared at her then sighed as he picked her up. She fidgeted around in his hold and turned her head into his chest.

Damon then felt something sucking on his leather jacket. He looked down in horror as Miranda was trying to suck through his shirt. "Whoa kid, you have the wrong person." Damon quickly yanked the child away from him and made his way downstairs. Miranda started crying. Damon groaned. "Hold on!" Almost ripping the fridge door off its hinges, Damon snatched a full bottle of milk and threw it in the microwave. He could feel his ears beginning to ring as the crying intensified. He sighed as he looked down at the child intensely. "Please stop crying." he said as his pupils grew big and then reverted back to normal size. Miranda sniffled and her cries came to a halt. Damon grinned as he took the now warm bottle of milk and placed it at the entrance of the child's mouth. The pink lips latched onto the nipple as if suddenly it was being pulled there by an unknown force. Damon held the bottle steady as she drained the container of its contents. "Good girl." Damon praised her as he laid her head on his shoulder and patted her back softly, trying to get her to burp. When he heard the tiny sound he lifted her up and cradled her in his arms as he walked over to the sink with the baby tub in it. He stripped her down while the water was running and placed her in the tub.

He ran his hands through the water and grabbed the baby shampoo, putting a little bit into his hands and rubbing them together. Gently, he pulled Miranda's tiny body into a upright postition and held her there while he scrubbed her hair. Miranda giggled as she pounded the water with her tiny hands, causing water to splash out and get Damon wet. "Ah, what the-" Damon's sentence was cut off as bubbly water entered his mouth and caused him to gag. He spat the water out and glared at the smiling child who was still making a mess. "Stop it!" he yelled at her, eyes glowing bright red and fangs beginning to lengthen. Miranda's childish laugh filled the room as a rubble ducky flew out of the sky and conked Damon on the head. Damon held his breath and counted to five as his eyes returned to their ocean blue state and his fangs retracted back into his mouth.

He quickly washed the soap off of Miranda's head and wrapped her in s towel to dry her off with. After he put on a clean diaper and a pajama, he laid the half asleep Miranda into her crib as she sucked softly on a pacifier. He turned on the hanging mobile above her bed which started to play "Twinkle Twinkle Little Stars" and left the room.

Stefan moaned in content as Elena crushed her mouth with his, their lips moving in sync as they filled the other with absolute pleasure. Elena grasped the brown hair and pulled hard, making Stefan moan and wrap his arms tighter around Elena's small frame. The twinkling of the stars glittered and shone brightly in the sky. The slivery light shone down on the couple and the lush-filled area around them. Fresh blades of grass lightly moved to one side as the gentle touch of the wind flew by. Stefan layed contently on the grass next to Elena whose arms were tightly bound to his body. "I love you." Stefan's voice was lighter then the nonexistent breeze blowing around them but filled with more passion then all the stars in the sky.

"I love you too." Elena smiled at Stefan as they kissed and laid contently in each other's arms, neither one willing to move.

Elena took one last look at the beauty of the sky before drifting off to sleep in Stefan's arms.

A/N: So sorry it took me awhile to update! I had some writer's block and took me awhile to get through that. Please enjoy this chapter and review! 


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I'm thinking that this will be the last one since I'm running out of ideas on what "fun" things Miranda and Damon can do together. Either I'll end this fic here, and write a sequel or just end it completely. What do you guys think?

Chapter 4

Damon looked up from his magazine to see the door unlocking and Elena and Stefan coming through. "So, how was your night?" Stefan asked with a big grin plastered on his face.

Damon just glared, but then the glare vanished and was replaced with a smile. "Perfectly fine." he said coolly.

Elena snorted. "Yeah, Damon it went perfectly fine. Especially when our little angel crapped all over you!"

Damon just continued to smile. "That was nothing. In fact she was quite adorable."

Stefan smirked. "Well if that's how you feel then I'm sure you won't complain if we go out again."

Damon's eyes widened. "You wouldn't."

Stefan laughed. "What's the matter Damon? I thought you said that she was no trouble?"

Damon growled, dropping his facade. "One night is enough! And besides, how do you know that I'll be able to keep my temper in check the next time? How do you know that you won't arrive home to a dead child?"

"You won't hurt her."

Damon laughed. "Do you want to test that theory?"

Stefan looked to Elena who shook her head. "Not tonight guys, please. I just want to go see my precious baby. I'll be back in a bit."

Damon snorted as Elena climbed up the stairs. "Little devil is more like it!"

He then turned back to his brother. "So, aren't you going to see the person who made my life a living hell in the past 3 hours?"

"Yeah, I am, but first, don't you want to hear about how my night went?"

Damon rolled his eyes. "I can imagine. You two drinking wine under the starry night while cuddled up to each other. Both of your tongues in each other's mouths."

Stefan grinned. "It was great. Too bad you had baby duty."

Damon smiled sarcastically. "Yeah, too bad I had to take care of that "sweet angel." Ah speak of the devil."

Stefan looked up to see Elena walking downstairs with Miranda in their arms, cuddled up to Elena's chest and wide awake. "Mommy missed you," Elena cooed to baby as she placed a loving kiss on her forehead. "Did you have fun with uncle Damon?"

"Oh she had a crap load of fun." Damon said sarcastically.

Stefan walked over to where his wife and child were and took Miranda from Elena. He cradled her in his arms, holding her close to his chest in a protective way and smiled lovingly down at her. Miranda cooed up at him, making baby noises and only increased Stefan's smile as he kissed her. "I love you." he whispered to the child.

Damon just stood there with a look of disgust on his face. "If you're done giving that kid uneeded attention then it's time we go out hunting. I haven't eaten anything since yesterday and you're low on blood too."

Stefan planted another kiss on Miranda one last time before handing her back to Elena. "We'll be back soon ok?" he kissed Elena's forehead before walking out the front door with Damon.

Elena sighed as she walked back upstairs and layed the now sleeping child back in her crib. "Sweet dreams sweetie." Elena switched on the hanging moblie ubove the Miranda's crib and quietly closed the door.

Fin

A/N: Well, what do you think? Sorry it was short. Should I continue with a sequel or stop here? And if I do, what should I make the sequel be about? Please tell me and review!:)


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